"Beneath the Pier" at Lovecraft e-Zine

"Beneath the Pier," one of my most recent little tales of fear, horror, dread, and woe, is now live at Lovecraft e-Zine (issue #21). The online edition is free. You can get the entire issue for your Kindle or Nook for $2.99, or the podcast edition for 99¢. Here's a little teaser from "Beneath the Pier":

Mercer was only fifty, but they called him "Old Grand-dad," like the whiskey, because he had made the trip to Lufford Bay every year since the others were adolescents and his weathered features and thin, sandy hair made him look wise—or perhaps more apt, battered but unbeaten. He liked these young people; six of them this year: the sons and daughters of his companions from trips long past, when the highway between Georgetown and Charleston was little more than a rutted, two-lane passage through the pine forests, cotton fields, and marshes. The highway was bigger and better paved now, but once you left it for the narrow, sandy roads that snaked toward the bay, you went back a hundred years, or thousands, into a lonely, primeval landscape that once had been the domain only of pioneers, pirates, and the Swamp Fox.

Once each year they came, early in the autumn, while the ocean was warm even as a chill began to overtake the nights. There was too much marsh and mud here for hotels and tourists, so Lufford remained mostly unspoiled by humans. Nature, however, had smashed it time and again with wind and water, leaving behind vast networks of black, reed-ridden pools and scattered clusters of only the sturdiest oaks, their branches choked and dripping with Spanish moss, their trunks gnarled, bent, and knotted. The beach cabin looked as if the slightest breeze might topple it, yet it had withstood five decades of storms and might stand for just as many more. Its dark bulk squatted atop a balustrade of bowed stilts, its sharply angled roof crooked but sturdy, its seams still sealed against the elements. Mercer didn’t remember what color it might have been, all the paint long since stripped, the splintered wooden siding now as gray as ancient cobweb. His father had built the house to endure.

The two four-wheel drive vehicles rattled and shuddered as they pulled up next to the cabin, their bodies and tires coated with fine gray sand. Mercer drove the lead truck; he always drove. Without a word to his companions, he shoved the door open and dropped into a bed of sand that swallowed his feet to his ankles. The others disembarked slowly, sighing and groaning after the long drive from Chapel Hill. The late afternoon sun was hot, almost stifling, but within the hour, the ocean breeze would turn cool, and come nightfall, a roaring fire would feel like heaven.

"I thirst," Ted Wakefield rumbled, stretching his arms out, Christ-like. "Rum, I think."

Check out the issue — if there's not too much seriously wrong with you (or maybe if there is), you'll love the hell out of it. Also on board are authors Joe Pulver, Gerry Huntman, Tom Lynch, and Wilum H. Pugmire; artists Nick Gucker, Mike Dominic, Stephen Lukac, Robert Elrod, Leslie Herzfeld, and Adam Baker; and audio readers Vincent LaRosa, Chaz Engan, David Binks, Lew Columbus, and Morgan Scorpion. Lovecraft e-Zine is edited by Mike Davis.

Earth, Wind, Fire, & Water

Everybody's got a laughing place. For some, it's a
crematorium oven in an old WWII POW compound.

Earth, Wind, Fire, & Water (GCJJTP). Headed out the door bright and early this morning, bound for Butner, just northeast of Durham, to meet up with a group of 20-some cachers determined to tackle this modest little hide. It's a four-stager, with each stage progressively more challenging — physically and otherwise — than the last. Among the suggested accouterments to bring along is a Native American numerologist, and, as the lot of us soon found out, for good reason. We gathered near stage 1 at 10:00 AM, and soon we were hiking out to ground zero, which turned out to be a crumbling ammo bunker circa World War II. We found and decrypted the hide quickly enough; returning it to its hiding place — an interesting balancing act — was no doubt my main material contribution to the group for the day. Alas, I did manage to carelessly place myself directly beneath a massive deluge of rusty debris as I maneuvered certain objects and ended up a very dirty Damned Rodan. From there, we had to negotiate some fairly treacherous terrain to reach the next stage, which certain of our party made short work of. At this point, though, the team became quite fragmented, and getting us all back together was kind of like trying to herd cats. At last, though, we found ourselves more or less regrouped, and thus resumed our forward progress. At the parking area for stage 3, Mr. Steve "Nthacker66" Thacker procured us a tasty bit of venison for lunch, and after we finished urping, we made the short hike to a challenging and fairly spectacular ground zero. Happily, we had brought along a few agile cachemonkeys to undertake the acrobatics — the highlight of which was an airborne squirrel passing directly over the heads of our unsuspecting, precariously perched daredevils. Finally, we're down to the final endeavor. This one had us scratching our heads for a bit, but at last, the hide revealed itself. An intrepid few of our number — military guys, much to our benefit — geared up for the job, which proved anything but quick and easy. There were a couple of fairly hairy moments here, but at the end of it, we all managed to scribble our signatures in the logbook. The cache owner and a previous finder or two came along to witness the proceedings, and I'm pretty sure they got themselves a few chuckles along the way. A great cache indeed, and a mighty fine crowd of cachers to do it with. Could hardly have asked for a better day. Many thanks to the CO and all who came out for the venture.

Hmm, did I say modest little hide up there? I meant monster hide. Yeah, that was it.

Don't do it, Ms. Nocona, don't jump! It's not THAT bad!!!

Wonder where this stage might be hidden?

Oh... yeah, there.

NOMS!

I say, are there trolls in this neighborhood?

Why, yes there are. The victorious caching party on the old bridge.

A New Angel

Martha and Mum at Christmas, 2008

Growing up in Martinsville, VA, I had not one mom but two. More or less, anyway. My mom's best friend, Martha Wickliffe, was a constant in our family, always there to keep my brother and I straight when Mum and Dad weren't able, and, in later years, as a dear friend and confidant who always knew just the right thing to say or do whenever life offered up one of its inevitable challenges. Back in 2000 and 2001, When my dad was going through his final trials, Martha and her husband, Dick, were my family's lifeline; I really don't know how any of us, especially my mom, would have sanely made it through that period if Martha and Dick hadn't been there to provide physical, emotional, and spiritual support.

Martha has been going through her own terrible trials these past couple of years, and she finally succumbed on this past Tuesday, January 15, 2013. The funeral was today in Martinsville.

Martha and Dick had three young' uns — Gretchen, who is my age; Todd, a couple of years younger; and Scott, five years younger and the same age as my brother. We spent a lot of our youthful years together, making mischief, sometimes getting in trouble (it was all Scott's fault, of course — except for those times it wasn't), playing army, creating mad scientist creations, climbing way too high up any tree we could find, wracking ourselves up playing tackle football sans any form of protection... all that good stuff that kids do. We often tried to keep our parents from discovering the crap we were up to, but they had ways of figuring it out... especially Martha. She always seemed tuned in to our secrets, and if it became necessary to foil us for our own safety, she would do it happily — but in such a way that it was "cool." When the general perception among the adults was that I was misbehaving (clearly this was wrong because I never did any such thing), she wouldn't tell Mum but have a little heart-to-heart with me, which usually made me feel a wee bit ashamed of myself — but not at the expense of my personal dignity. Now, I don't know whether Gretchen, Todd, and Scott got this kind of treatment (I suspect she just whooped them), but I think it's safe to say that her brand of discipline perfectly complemented my folks', who could straighten me out all right, but never so pleasantly as Martha.

As an adult, I maintained a close friendship with Martha, and for so many years, she was there to share her unique brand of wisdom with me, particularly when we were going through my dad's crisis and when my marriage began to crumble. I credit Martha with helping me understand Peg in a way I never could have on my own, which I think truly helped us work through the divorce as amiably as we did.

Martha Wickliffe was a guiding angel in my life, and I know I'll miss her with all my heart. But her influence on me was profound, and that is something that will remain with me till my time comes. In my just over a half-century of existence, I've been privileged to know many shining examples of life and how to live it, and Martha was among the brightest. Rest in peace, my dear friend.

Martha snugger than a bug in a rug.

Christmas 2008: Happy times. Back: Martha and Dick Wickliffe, Mum, Peggy Rainey, old dude.
Front: Mary Clifton, brother Phred

It Was a Dark, Snowy, Sleety, Rainy, Windy, Thundery Night

After several days of temperatures that insinuated summer might be in the offing, we get our first winter storm, and it was kind of a doozy. Don't think I've ever experienced snow, sleet, rain, wind, lightning, and thunder simultaneously until tonight. And for some time, I kept hearing the distinctive, repetitive sound of footsteps on my roof. It unnerved the cats, and they all skulked off to hide. I took my camera and went outside for a bit, but couldn't spot any supernatural entities lurking about. Lots of snowflakes with delusions of grandeur, though — some as big as the Cockroach What Ate Cincinnati.

Now, back into the warmth, which I am very thankful to have. I hope whatever's walking around on my roof doesn't poke holes in it.

And a late addendum. I had no sooner typed the above when the power went out. Fortunately, the house didn't get too cold, and the electricity was restored sometime around 1:00 AM. Things are returning to normal.... as they said in Invasion of the Body Snatchers....

THE MONARCHS — Get the e-Book Now!

Yes sir, the e-book edition of The Monarchs is available now — in Mobi (Kindle), ePub (Sony/Nook/iPad/Kobo), PDF (Adobe), and PRC (Mobipocket) formats. You can pick it up directly from Crossroad Press for $4.99 (try buying a glass of wine for that!) here: Crossroad Press: The Monarchs. Or you can get it (for the same price) for the Nook directly from Barnes & Noble (Barnes & Noble: The Monarchs) or for Kindle directly from Amazon.com (Amazon.com: The Monarchs). The Monarchs is scheduled to be featured in Barnes & Noble's "Nook First" program on February 7.

The trade paperback and hardcover editions will be available in February as well.

You can view a portion of the novel on both the Barnes & Noble and Amazon sites. Or you can read a sample chapter at my website, here: The Realm of Stephen Mark Rainey: The Monarchs.

Give it a look, that you may shake, rattle, and moan to your heart's utter delight.

That is all.

Another Mini-Milestone

Lord have mercy, a terrible coffee accident!

I'm pretty sure today was the first time I've ever considered turning on the air conditioning in my house in January, since the temperature upstairs was pushing 80 degrees this afternoon. Outside, it was in the mid 70s, which is kind of obscene for this time of year, but at least it made for some good geocaching weather. Yesterday, I was up and out before the crack of dawn, bound for Martinsville and Eden, where several new caches had been published. The ones in Martinsville — four entertaining "mystery" caches, which required solving puzzles in advance to obtain the coordinates for the hide — put me on the Dick & Willie Rail Trail, formerly the Danville & Western rail line; the hikes weren't terribly long, but most enjoyable in the early morning mist. From there, it was off to Freedom Park in Eden to snag a couple of more new hides.

Last night, Ms. Kimberly and I caught The Hobbit in 3D and iMax, which was visually impressive and generally entertaining, if not quite spot-on in the direction department. Following, we hit Singha II in High Point for some decent Thai food, then The Vino Shoppe, just down the road from there, for a wee spot of wine. A few episodes of Twin Peaks, which we've been watching from the beginning, wrapped up the evening.

Today, it was out on the caching trail again with Debbie "Cupdaisy" Shoffner — mostly park-n-grab caches in Rockingham County. We busted the cache owner, Mr DanRiverRunner (a.k.a. CountryBicycleRider), planting a few caches, and thus located one of his new hides before it was published. It came out tonight, actually, and is appropriately named "Busted." We got first-to-find, and it turned out to be my "mini-milestone" 5,500th cache find. All kinds of fun, wot? The day was spoiled only by Cupdaisy very rudely hitting the accelerator while I was taking a big old slug of coffee, sending a fair quantity of it out of the cup, as evidenced in the photo above. I'm a forgiving soul, of course, so I'll only hold it against her for the rest of my natural life and half of the next.

That is all.

First to Find

King of the hill. Er... rock.

First to find new geocaches, that is. Last night, late, I got notification of a new cache not far down the road, so after Kimberly and I wound up a most enjoyable evening — dinner at The Claddagh in High Point and then some episodes of Twin Peaks — I decided to head out after it. Just a park-and-grab hide, but no one else had logged it, so it was a fun little first-to-find at 1:20 in the AM. I was reminded by some that this is an utterly indecent hour, but hey... it's a cache. It's all about the fun.

Another enjoyable full-day outing today, with Bridget "Suntigres" Langley and her friend Dan, who's trying out caching for the first time. Snagged 29, if my math is correct, including another FTF and a fair number of creative hides, including a match container inside a hole in a telephone pole covered by a magnet-backed metal strip; a stick hanging from a tree (yep); a metal plate concealing a bison tube in the ground; and a bison tube hanging inside some evergreens that required some seriously prickly crawling to reach. Most fun of all, I got to climb stone pylons, boulders, and park signs. We ended it all by meeting Kimberly at Bill's Pizza Pub on Randleman Road for a big old pizza feast.

The weekend was far more enjoyable than the week to come, I fear. Son of beech.

That is all.

Yessir, dude up on sign. Nice view from here!

L: The old Cedar Falls Post Office; R: Bridget holding some wood

Ranking 007

I rarely give more than half a hoot about "best of so-and-so" lists since they mean exactly jack shit, but now and again — depending on my mood, I suppose — I derive a little enjoyment from them, particularly when the subject matter is near and dear to me aging ticker. This morning, I came upon a best-to-worst list of James Bond movies, and while there were some entries with which I quite agreed, I mostly thought the thing pretty well out of whack. That's the beauty of lists, though; you can jump up and down in delighted agreement, swear the creators ought to be flayed for their audacious stupidity, or just avert your eyes because the whole idea is ridiculous. Said list this morning kind of made me want to compile one of my own. So... what the hell. Since the screen's Bond is 50 years old, Skyfall has surpassed the billion-dollar mark in ticket sales, and I've been on a bit of a Bond kick myself lately, for my first blog of 2013, I'm going to make me a list — not necessarily of my favorite and least favorite EON Productions' Bond films, but what I consider the best and worst of the series, starting at the bottom and working toward the top. Like most, I suppose, the list's middle entries are the most difficult to settle upon; the very best and very worst are easy. Your reaction may be one of the above or something altogether different, and that's just fine because, yes, I am gonna make me this list. And thus, with no further ado...

Damned Rodan's List of Damned Bond Films (Worst to Best): 

#23: Die Another Day
Pierce Brosnan's last outing as 007... easily his worst, and the series' absolute rock-bottom entry. It opens with some promise, despite Madonna's hideous theme song (second only to Jack White and Alicia Keys' song for Quantum of Solace for pure awfulness), but quickly devolves into second-rate science-fiction, loaded to the gills with poor CGI, and featuring the most idiotic of all 007's technological accouterments — an "invisible" Aston Martin.

#22: Moonraker
One of the most glaring examples ever of fabulous special effects going to waste on a stupid movie. And stupid it is — Roger Moore at his most fatuous, a plot recycled from The Spy Who Loved Me recycled from You Only Live Twice (all directed by Lewis Gilbert; a pattern, perhaps?), another cookie-cutter megalomaniacal villain in Hugo Drax (played without much panache by Michael Lonsdale), and the nadir of the series' plunge into sophomoric humor. John Barry's lush musical score, including the title song, sung by Shirley Bassey (her third and final Bond theme), tries hard to bring some gravitas to the proceedings; mais alas.

#21: The Man With the Golden Gun
Roger Moore as the lost Stooge. While Live and Let Die injected more comedy — mostly vapid — into the series than ever before, The Man With the Golden Gun plunges right into slapstick. Roger Moore is only slightly less wooden than in the previous entry, and even a dignified performance by Christopher Lee as the notorious hit man Scaramanga does little to make this almost-not-a-Bond-film palatable. John Barry's score is, as usual, high-grade, though the title song, with its inane lyrics and vocals by Lulu, who sounds like a chipmunk on helium, induces groans and uncomfortable chuckles. Not what you really want in a Bond theme song.

#20: A View to a Kill
Like so many of Roger Moore's outings, this film opens with promise — at least until the chorus of The Beach Boys' "California Girls" interrupts an otherwise reasonably engaging ski chase. Moore again at his witless worst, Christopher Walken and Patrick Macnee pretty much wasted, and Tanya Roberts as one of the least animated Bond girls ever to hit celluloid. Oh, and what's this? Yet more juvenile humor? Big sigh. Duran Duran's title song is high-octane stuff, though Maurice Binder's title sequence is the most gaudy, unappealing ever.

#19: Octopussy
There's actually a lot to like about Octopussy — particularly Louis Jourdan as the suave but treacherous Kamal Khan — but an equal or greater measure to loathe. It's one of Moore's better performances as Bond, but the constant, inappropriate insertion of juvenile humor spoils one potentially exciting scene after another. Maud Adams plays the intriguing character of Octopussy with far more aplomb than she did Scaramanga's girlfriend, Andrea, in The Man With the Golden Gun. A good John Barry score overall, but the title song, "All-Time High," moaned by Rita Coolidge, is one of the series' dullest.

#18: Live and Let Die
I actually enjoy Live and Let Die more than my ranking might indicate, but objectively, I have to place it pretty far down the list for Moore's sincere but awkward attempt at taking on the role for the first time and the film's frequent lapses into ill-timed comedy. Yaphet Kotto as Mr. Big/Dr. Kananga has his moments, though, in its time, the film moving into blaxploitation territory seemed a bit of a shock. The title song by Paul McCartney & Wings proved to be one of the series' most memorable, and the score by "fifth Beetle" George Martin, while a bit dated, stands out as one of the best non-John Barry efforts.

#18: The World Is Not Enough
Neither a terrible nor superlative entry in the series, The World Is Not Enough (the Bond family motto) offers a few decent plot elements, an engaging female villain (Elektra King, played by Sophie Marceau), and Pierce Brosnan comfortable and confident in the Bond role. It also features the rather dull antagonist Reynard (Robert Carlyle), who is unable to feel pain because of a bullet lodged in his brain, and Denise Richards as nuclear physicist Christmas Jones. Say no more. An unremarkable score by David Arnold, though the title song, performed by Garbage, is agreeably, thoroughly Bond-ish.

#16: Tomorrow Never Dies
Probably Pierce Brosnan's best performance as Bond. Media mogul Elliott Carver (Jonathan Pryce) looks to start World War III so his news network can get the big scoop. This improbable scenario at least offers a number of exciting moments, with some daring stunt work. The very appealing Michele Yeoh appears as Chinese agent and Bond ally Wai Lin. David Arnold's score offers a few distinctive moments. The title song by Sheryl Crow is nothing to write home about, though K. D. Lang belts out a much more Bond-like — and far more satisfying — tune ("Surrender") over the end credits.

#15: You Only Live Twice
Most reviewers and fans rate Sean Connery's fifth outing as James Bond much higher, but I can't get past the film's excessive inanities, plot holes, and visual gaffes. While there's a lot to like about Roald Dahl's screenplay, director Lewis Gilbert mucks up detail after detail — not unlike in his later directorial efforts. Donald Pleasance exudes cartoon menace as the quintessential Bond villain, Ernst Stavro Blofeld, but his diminutive stature is quite at odds with Fleming's imposing literary character. Connery sleepwalks through the production, clearly tired of the role that for many years defined him as an actor. A pleasant John Barry score and melodic theme song sung by Nancy Sinatra.

#14: Goldeneye
Pierce Brosnan's first outing as Bond is among his better ones. He plays the character with some of the same darkness that Timothy Dalton brought to the role but appears far more comfortable handling the necessary humor. Sean Bean, despite his considerable talent as an actor, seems oddly lifeless as MI6-agent-turned-villain Alec Trevelyan. Izabella Scorupco, as Russian weapons system expert Natalya Simonova, and Famke Janssen, as Russian assassin Xenia Onatopp, both play refreshingly strong female characters. Tina Turner provides the vocals for a striking theme song, though the score by Eric Serra, while oftentimes atmospheric, is too low-key to get very excited about.

#13: The Spy Who Loved Me
A much more straightforward, oftentimes exciting Bond adventure than many from the Moore era, The Spy Who Loved Me still lapses into horrid humor too frequently to be wholly palatable. Roger Moore does turn in one of his better performances, though not without several cringe-inducing moments. Barbara Bach isn't bad as Russian spy Anya Amasova; her acting is competent at best, but the character makes for a stronger than customary female lead for this era of Bond movies. Marvin Hamlisch provides a mostly lackluster, sometimes irritating score, and Carly Simon performs the reasonably agreeable title song, "Nobody Does It Better."

#12: Quantum of Solace
This film, Daniel Craig's second as Bond, takes up where Casino Royale left off, and while Craig hones his skills as 007, the movie never comes near the level of excellence achieved by its predecessor. Its best moments are all Craig's, especially during his more emotionally charged scenes, such as the death of Inspector Mathis (Giancarlo Giannini). Villain Dominic Greene isn't terribly exciting, though Mathieu Amalric plays the part with enough bile to raise a little shudder or two. David Arnold turns in one of his better scores, though the title song by Jack White and Alicia Keys is the most repulsive piece of shit ever to play over the title credits.

#11: The Living Daylights
Timothy Dalton brings some much needed Fleming to the character of James Bond. After Roger Moore's tenure, which ran a bit past its prime, the series certainly needed some reshaping. Dalton did capture the darker essence of Bond but appeared worse than uncomfortable with the moments of levity required of the screen character. The plot is among the series' most dated, in which Afghani mujahideen team up with Bond to foil a plot by mad mercenary Brad Whittaker (Joe Don Baker) and rogue KGB agent Georgi Koskov (Jeroen Krabbe) to profit from illicit arms and drug deals. John Barry's score shines, with electronic augmentation to his traditional orchestrations, and while A-ha's effective title song mimics the style of Duran Duran's A View to a Kill, it never achieved nearly as much commercial success.

#10: Licence to Kill
Dalton's second Bond film is the better of the two, though it often feels more like Die Hard-noir than a typical Bond film. The film's dark, serious tone, featuring the drawn-from-life villain Franz Sanchez (Robert Davi) foreshadows the style of the Daniel Craig entries in the franchise. Timothy Dalton seems far more comfortable as Bond, and Carey Lowell as CIA field agent Pam Bouvier capably handles both levity and substance. Gladys Knight provides vocals for the excellent title song, which echoes strains of Goldfinger, but "lackluster" is too kind a term for Michael Kamen's deadly dull musical score.

#9: For Your Eyes Only
Easily Roger Moore's best performance as Bond and the best film to be made during his tenure. There's actually some Fleming to be found in the screenplay, which, during the Moore era, was a rarity indeed. Mostly eschewing juvenile humor and far-fetched plots, the story harkens back to the style of From Russia With Love and On Her Majesty's Secret Service, though it still falls short of these particular landmark films. Sadly, a well-staged opening finishes with one of the series' single stupidest moments; in fact, it's so bad, getting past it to appreciate the rest of the film is actually an effort. Carole Bouquet as vengeance-driven Melina Havelock has some good moments, though, on the whole, she isn't one of the series most outstanding Bond girls. And another negative in the midst of so much positive: Lynn Holly Johnson as young nymphomaniac Bibi Dahl, a character so pointless that every scene with her could have been excised without impacting the film. Bill Conti offers a mostly unremarkable score, though a few of the tracks provide effective atmosphere. Sheena Easton sings the romantic title song to Maurice Binder's best title sequence since the 1960s Bond films.

#8: Diamonds Are Forever
Sean Connery's final appearance as 007 (until Irvin Kershner's Never Say Never Again in 1983) is actually one of my personal favorites — it was the first Bond film I ever saw — though in good conscience I can't rank it higher here. While the movie draws inspiration from some of the earlier, better Connery films, its lapses into zaniness uncomfortably foreshadow the tone of the Roger Moore Bonds. Charles Gray plays Ernst Stavro Blofeld with more charm and humor than either Pleasance or Savalas — which can be jarring, given Fleming's original description of Blofeld as an imposing, Mussolini-like figure — but his sharp lines and personal charisma make the character memorable. Jill St. John as Tiffany Case may come off as a bit dizzy, yet she possesses enough wit and will to present Bond with a somewhat challenging female lead. Jimmy Dean, as reclusive millionaire Willard Whyte, provides some of the series' best comedic moments, and Connery's one-liners are sharper than ever. Bruce Glover and Putter Smith as gay assassins Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd, respectively, each bring an engaging quirkiness to their characters, mostly bouncing amusing one-liners off each other. John Barry composes one of the franchise's best musical scores, including the title song, sung by Shirley Bassey.

#7: Doctor No
The very first Bond film isn't the best of them — it seems at times outright amateurish — but it's reasonably true to the novel and sets up a respectable tone for the films that follow immediately. Connery stands out as the consummate Bond, and while he isn't exactly Fleming's Bond, he absolutely nails most of the qualities that distinguished the literary character. As the title villain, Joseph Wiseman is perfectly cast; again, a departure from his literary counterpart, but every bit as imposing, if not more so.

#6: Skyfall
The most recent Bond film showcases Daniel Craig's talents to an even greater degree than the previous two. Also, the character of M (Judi Dench) gets more than customary screen time and development. Javier Bardem as Raoul Silva, a former MI6 agent seeking revenge for having been abandoned on a deadly mission, in some ways mirrors Sean Bean's Alex Trevelyan in Goldeneye, though he is a much more engaging antagonist. The stunt work may be a little more over the top than in Casino Royale, but it's also better staged than the too-frenetic action of Quantum of Solace. Like many of David Arnold's scores, Thomas Newman's lacks distinctiveness and cohesiveness, but the title song by Adele is appealing.

#5: Thunderball
By 1965, Connery had Bond down to a tee, and the films' formula had become engraved in the film-going public's mind. Thunderball hits mostly high notes, though some of the gadgets were now becoming pretty far-fetched, the witty rejoinders timed like clockwork. Chief villain Emilio Largo (Adolfo Celi) possesses an imposing stature, much like Auric Goldfinger before him, and his Roman features convey quiet menace with just the slightest scowl. The climactic underwater fight proves quite the spectacle to behold. John Barry's score creates a somber, aquatic atmosphere, and the main theme, brilliantly sung by Tom Jones, accompanies a superb Maurice Binder title sequence.

#4: Casino Royale
A landmark film in many ways, Casino Royale re-invents James Bond, going back to his roots as an agent of MI6. Continuity in the Bond universe has never been much of a consideration, and it's easy enough to accept this contemporary rebooting. Craig creates a Bond clearly drawn from Fleming's original, though he is quieter, more introverted, and more darkly dangerous — very different from any other actor's portrayal of the character. Mads Mikkelsen plays the desperate villain Le Chiffre with just the right blend of humor and subtle malevolence. Eva Greene as Vesper Lynd possesses the ideal combination of vulnerability and coolness. David Arnold's score distinguishes itself a bit more than usual, and Chris Cornell's rousing title song, "You Know My Name" — the lyrics of which overtly reflect M's point of view — sets the perfect mood for the film.

#3: From Russia With Love
Sean Connery's second appearance as Bond and easily his second best. For the most part, the movie faithfully follows the novel, with some well-conceived alterations. It stands as the best honest-to-god spy thriller of the entire series, with atmosphere reminiscent of a Hitchcock mystery. Lotte Lenya as the brutal Russian SMERSH-turned-SPECTRE agent couldn't be more brilliantly repulsive, and Robert Shaw as the assassin Red Grant is very likely the most believable and dangerous of all the bad guys ever to menace James Bond. John Barry's score complements the action wonderfully, at least in most instances; a few ill-timed tracks occasionally mar its overall effectiveness.

#2: On Her Majesty's Secret Service
Choosing between OHMSS and Goldfinger as the "best" Bond film is indeed difficult. Both take the cores of the respective novels and in some ways improve on the original stories. OHMSS may be the most visually gorgeous of all the films, with much of the action taking place high in the Swiss Alps. The ski chases truly elevate one's adrenaline levels, particularly in conjunction with John Barry's score — also perhaps the finest of the entire series. The main theme is a rare instrumental and is all the better for it, played to Maurice Binder's most effective title sequence. George Lazenby is far from the best cinematic Bond, but he's an acceptable successor to Connery, particularly when it comes to handling the physical stunts. Had he continued in the role, I suspect audiences would have become quite comfortable with him. Telly Savalas is certainly "different" as Blofeld, but he does make for an effectively sinister antagonist. And Diana Rigg may be the best-drawn female protagonist of the entire series.

#1: Goldfinger
Goldfinger is a near-perfect Bond film, featuring excellent pacing, first-rate acting, gorgeous scenery, memorable women, and one of the sharpest theme songs/title sequences ever conceived for any film. Sean Connery turns in his best performance as Bond; in fact, this is very likely the film in which Connery truly became James Bond for millions of movie-goers. Gert Frobe plays Auric Goldfinger, the madman obsessed with gold, just a bit over-the-top, but with ultimate believability (and while his voice is dubbed, it's so perfect that most viewers don't realize it). The extraordinary Honor Blackman may also have the distinction of playing the most unforgettable Bond girl, if but for her character's name — Pussy Galore. Shirley Eaton is also memorable as Jill Masterson, the girl whose body is painted completely gold. Special props go to Harold Sakata as the iconic Oddjob, Goldfinger's mute Korean manservant, probably best remembered for his steel-rimmed top hat, which he uses to deadly effect. The gadgets are particularly novel this time around but never upstage Bond himself, as they tend to do in later films. A fine score by John Barry rounds out the superlative production.

Such Misery

I wasn't really planning to go see Les Miserables, but I received an invite to do this thing, so that was that. I've never seen the stage production, and I only read the Classics Illustrated comic adaptation when I was a youngster, so I had no preconceived notions about the story. As for the film, the only real advance knowledge I had came from a featurette I saw a while back about the actors actually singing their parts live rather than being dubbed. Rather than an in-depth review, I'll just offer up a few thoughts, for I did find it a significant, noteworthy cinematic production.

There are a handful of musicals that I really love, most going back to childhood: The Wizard of Oz, of course; The King and I; My Fair Lady; Camelot; South Pacific; even The Sound of Music, to some degree. In more recent years, I've been quite taken with Sweeney Todd and Wicked. In general, though, the musical is not a theatrical form of which I am terribly enamored. Les Mis offers a handful of impressive songs — certainly the numbers are beautifully staged and performed — but by and large, I can't say I found much of the music memorable or otherwise distinctive.

Technically, Tom Hooper's Les Mis is a beautiful film, with loads of CGI that's obvious yet artful; it blends rather than intrudes.The stylized sets, virtually to the last, feel dank and claustrophobic; certainly apt, given the setting. Thankfully, there are at least a few grand, panoramic shots strategically placed amid the scenes to offer some much-needed brightening, particularly after we have been confined to the grim, utterly depressing chambers of the paupers for such extensive portions of the very lengthy running time (157 minutes).

I was quite taken with the cast. Jackman is reliably excellent, and here, as former convict-turned-respected-mayor Jean Valjean, he turns in a superlative dramatic performance, with singing far beyond mere competence. I must say, Anne Hathaway surprised me with her masterful, emotive performance as Fantine; I've always given her credit as an actress, and this sewed it up for me. By the conclusion of "I Dreamed a Dream," I was in tears — one of two or three such occasions in the film. Now, whatever his personal lack of charm, I admire Russell Crowe as an actor; in fact, I can scarcely think of a performance in which he hasn't excelled. He does everything right in Les Mis except sing. He clearly gives it his best, but an operatic talent he is not. Still, I can't fault him but so much, for though he may not shine as a vocalist, he pays the character of Inspector Javert his absolute due. Helena Bonham Carter as Mme. Thénardier, the Innkeeper's wife.... well, she basically reprises her performance as Mrs. Lovett from Sweeney Todd. Certainly not a bad bit of casting for this character. And speaking of the Innkeeper... M. Thénardier... comic virtuoso Sacha Baron Cohen chews up the scenery — not to mention rotting meat, artificial appendages, cat tails, and bugs. If ever a production needed some comic livening, this is the one, and Cohen offers it up in spades. Amanda Seyfried as Cosette mostly wanders doe-eyed through the film, simply because that's the character's ordained fate, but in a couple of songs she does emote effectively.

I found the prevalence of Cockney accents in 19th-century France most disconcerting. Scarcely a trace of authentic French, or even French accent, to be heard. I can understand the actors eschewing what might play as mere affectation, but more neutral vocalizing might at least dull the shock of it, particularly in the case of the lad Gavroche, played by young Daniel Huttlestone, who might as well have come off the streets of Whitechapel in My Fair Lady.

I quite concur with many of the accolades bestowed upon director Tom Hooper for his work on this big, oftentimes impressive piece of theater. In numerous ways, it's a brilliant achievement. Yet, while individual moments of this film moved me as much as any film can, on the whole, I felt strangely unaffected, particularly during the second half the movie, when the young revolutionaries begin their plotting and the love story between Cosette and Marius — played at least competently by Eddie Redmayne — takes center stage. After the first hour and a half, I was really beginning to wonder whether my posterior would quite hold out till the end of the film. For all its virtues, Les Mis just doesn't call me to even attempt to watch it again. I suppose I might welcome an opportunity to check out the original stage production, but I would probably want some wine first.

Bloodrock

One of the most enjoyable activities to come with this Christmas season was participating in the Dirty Santa Geocaching event at The Corner Cafe in Ringgold, Virginia, a couple of weeks back. I happened to end up with a bunch of creative cache containers that are just begging to be placed out in the wild, so today I up and hid a couple along a new trail by Lake Townsend, just north of Greensboro. "Bloodrock" (GC43DEB, so named for a bright crimson mineral crystal I found out there), and "What's the Matter? Chicken?" (GC43DF0, a lock-n-lock box full of rubber chicken keychains, hidden in some slightly challenging terrain) now await some intrepid geocachers to venture out after them. Note: these caches are for premium members only, so if you're not one, those links will only take you to the main page at geocaching.com, not the actual cache listings. If you're a cacher and not a premium member, then by gummy you need to be. Go, go, go!

Godzilla vs. Big-Ass Plant

Godzilla vs. Biollante (Gojira Tai Biorante, 1989)

DVD Description:
Released by Echo Bridge, 2012; English language & Japanese language with subtitles. Additional material: Trailers, behind-the-scenes feature.

Directed by Kazuki Omori

Starring Kunihiko Mitamura, Yoshiko Tanaka, Masanobu Takashima, Koji Takahashi, Tôru Minegishi, Megumi Odaka, Yasuko Sawaguchi

Rating:

The second of the Heisei-era Godzilla films, Godzilla vs. Biollante is among the last of the Godzilla films never to have had a legitimate DVD release in the United States until very recently. The Echo Bridge DVD is just what the doctor ordered — incredibly inexpensive (I got it for $4.99 via Amazon.com), decent quality, with a very a nice behind-the-scenes feature. The audio options include the standard English-language dub as well as the original Japanese soundtrack, with two subtitle options.

Biollante opens in the aftermath of Godzilla's raid on Tokyo from the previous film. A research team collecting Godzilla's cells, which have been scattered among the ruins, is attacked by mercenaries from a company called Biomajor, who abscond with the Godzilla cells. But then the Biomajor team is then killed by a lone stranger, who proceeds to grab the Godzilla cells for himself. Turns out the stranger is agent SSS9 of a Middle Eastern nation called Saradia, which is funding research by Dr. Shiragami (Koji Takahashi), who hopes to combine Godzilla cells with grain cells, in order to create an indestructible, inexhaustible food supply. Shiragami, however, also has an agenda of his own: to use Godzilla's secret of immortality to resurrect his dead daughter, Erica (Yasuko Sawaguchi). His experiments go hopelessly awry, however, resulting in a bizarre hybrid of plant, human, and Godzilla cells. Meantime, in attempt to regain a supply of Godzilla cells, used to create Anti-Nuclear Bacteria — which can, in theory, utterly neutralize Godzilla — Biomajor threatens to unleash the great beast from his volcanic prison by setting off bombs at Mt. Mihara — which they end up doing. Godzilla emerges and, after a foiling an attack by Japan's newest defensive weapon, Super X2, enters and tramples Osaka. Biollante appears and attacks Godzilla, and the two monsters tear into each other, resulting in Biollante's apparent defeat. The Japanese military attacks Godzilla with Anti-Nuclear Bacteria, but it has no apparent effect — Godzilla's body temperature is too low for the organisms to be activated. To raise its temperature, they lure it to a microwave array, which creates artificial lightning, but then a bigger, transformed Biollante appears and attacks Godzilla again; this time, Godzilla disintegrates it, sending its spores drifting toward outer space. Finally, the Anti-Nuclear Bacteria begins to work, and Godzilla retreats to the sea, its ultimate fate uncertain. SSS9 returns a final time and murders Dr. Shiragami, but Super X2 pilot Kuroki (Masanobu Takashima) activates the microwave weapon and kills the Saradian agent.

Biollante, being a mutated hybrid, proves to be Godzilla's most unusual foe since Hedorah. The science-gone-awry aspect draws on at least a semblance of a real-life fear: that of genetic manipulation creating an unexpected horror. As part rose, part human, and part Godzilla, Biollante is a terrifying yet at least marginally sympathetic character. There's no stereotypical good-monster-vs.-bad-monster scenario here; just a pair of instinctive foes grappling for survival. The complex Biollante design is novel, to say the least and, with the combination of well-constructed miniatures and effective cinematography, achieves an impressive and memorable onscreen presence.

The Godzilla suit surpasses the design used in the previous movie, closely resembling the 1954 original, and becomes the prototype for the suits used in all of the Heisei-era films. The evil-looking facial features, with the unprecedented addition of red and black eyes and a double row of teeth, imbue Godzilla with a distinctly fearsome demeanor, very appropriate to the scope of this film — and to my mind, even more menacing than its pupil-less visage used in GMK in the Millenniium series.

Like most of the Heisei-era Godzillas, Biollante features a large cast, mostly utilized to good effect. Koji Takahashi plays Dr. Shiragami as a driven, brilliant eccentric, but also with a sensitive, sympathetic side. Takahashi's performance is understated rather than over-the-top, which is the far more effective approach. Megumi Odaka makes her debut as Miki Saegusa, a psychic who develops a special rapport with Godzilla, and continues the role through the remainder of the Heisei series. This is her best appearance, for she takes an active part in locating and then attempting to psychically combat Godzilla. JSDF Lieutenant Gondo, played by Toru Minigishi, stands out as one of the film's best characters, thanks to Minigishi's subtle quirkiness. His best moment comes when he attempts — unsuccessfully — to defuse the bombs planted at Mt. Mihara that will release Godzilla. As the clock counts down, and he realizes all is futile, he stands back, defeated, and utters a simple, "Amen."

Unfortunately, Koichi Sugiyama's musical score leaves much to be desired, frequently sounding thin and frenetic, more akin to an anime score than a live-action film. Conversely, the grander orchestral themes are entirely derivative of John Williams and play more like parody than true scoring. The best soundtrack cut is the opening theme, which has an eerie undertone, building to a driving, thudding pace, punctuated by sharp brass. Fortunately, this track, with a few variations, is used to good effect at several key moments in the film.

Godzilla vs. Biollante offers some novel ideas, decent characters, an interesting new monster, and a superb redesign of Godzilla. Though the film's flaws oftentimes stand out rather painfully, its many good — and occasionally excellent — moments make it a most noteworthy entry in the Godzilla universe.

Happy Happy Joy Joy!

Ahh. I do so love me some Christmastime. This year, it's anything but unhappy — I'm spending it with the people I love most, except for my daughter and brother, who couldn't be here — yet it does seem a little "off" in some crucial ways. My mom has suffered the loss of more than one of her closest friends quite recently, which makes the holiday for her bittersweet. I have been experiencing a few medical issues that are uncomfortable, to say the least, and that will require some further testing. Kimberly's dad was recently in the hospital undergoing major surgery (fortunately, he has come through with flying colors). For me, even when things have been otherwise rough, Christmas has generally been an oasis of happiness amid the storm. Somehow, everything seems a bit more fragile this year, and it's mainly due to the fact that some of us — no names mentioned — are just plain getting older and dealing with those inevitable age issues. I gotta tell you, as some of my mom's friends are fond of saying, getting old isn't for sissies. Still, today's company and setting couldn't be better. I've gotten in some caching. Kimberly and I just had a fabulous Mexican lunch, and we're heading out to see Skyfall (again) in just a little bit. All in all, for today, it would be hard to ask for anything more satisfying, so I guess I won't. How about this: I'm just going to wish blessings on the lot of you who come round this place now and again, and perhaps on even a few of you who don't. May you have the merriest of Christmases, or whatever holiday you celebrate, if any. Y'all be good, you hear?

Servante of Darkness: History and Horror

A couple of weeks back, professor and author Anthony Servante posted an intriguing blog about literary horror through the ages, beginning with Shakespeare's "McBeth" and ending with my novelette, "The Children of Burma," which appears in my fiction collection Legends of the Night. The full article — which also reviews Banished by Billie Sue Mosiman, Skin Trade by Tonia Brown, Merkabah Rider by Ed Erdelac, and Where Darkness Dwells by Glen Krisch — analyzes each work both by contemporary standards and the context of the historical period in which it is set. About "The Children of Burma," Mr. Servante had these — and other — kind words to say:

"...We are immersed in 1942, not only in the middle of a war, but in the mind of an imperial soldier of said war, and we witness the horrors of the man, the army and ultimately the monster itself. Whereas other historical horror stories (many which I eliminated from this article) generalized the historical setting to merely tell a horror story, Stephen Mark Rainey establishes the structure writers of this genre should emulate or at least aspire to imitate...."

I encourage you to check out the full text of the blog here: History and Horror: From Natural to Supernatural

Also, visit Mr. Servante's interview with me (and several other authors) at Cybernocturnalism: Old School Authors Speak Up, originally posted in October 2012.

"Asylum" in LORE 2.2

Looky looky! I've received my contributor copy of Lore magazine V2.2. It's a beautifully produced trade paperback–size publication of 167 pages, edited/published by Rod Heather and Sean O'Leary, featuring the following dozen mind-numbing, bone-chilling, soul-searing tales of horror:

"Enshrined" Bridget Coila
"Finny Moon" Keith P.Graham
"Congregate" Steve Rasnic Tem
"One in a Billion" Colin Heintze
"Asylum" Stephen Mark Rainey
"The House of Dreams" Nyki Blatchley
"Electric Souls on a Starless Planet" J.P. Boyd
"Lost in Darkness" Jeremy Harper
"Melbourn's Storm" Nickolas Furr
"Can Spring Be Far Behind?" Jeff Samson
"Tumor is the Night" Corey Mariani
"Nzambe" Denise Dumars

The superb cover artwork is by Christopher Allen. Visit Lore online at www.lore-online.com to pick up a copy of your very own — or to bestow as a holiday gift upon some poor, unsuspecting reader. Good creepy fun, you can bet on it, and this sucker is out just in time for the horrordays. You smile, I smile; yes, please.

Anglin' and Riverwalkin'

That's some little head that old Trail Dawg's got right there, wouldn't you say? Hey, and not to mention a big ol' bug. These are just a couple of the happy hides we uncovered in Danville this weekend — mostly at Angler's Park and on the Riverwalk along the Dan River. Every time I think there can't possibly be room for any more geocaches in that vicinity, a new bunch pops up. Mr. Isenhour and I spent the better part of yesterday exerting ourselves mightily and snagging a number of clever hides, followed by a big ol' whoppin' Ham's burger. Over a period of a couple of years, Danville has gone from having a scant handful of geocaches to becoming a regular Mecca of creative, oftentimes challenging hides (see "The Amazing Electric Rock & Other Caches," November 4, 2012; "Pastorale," January 9, 2012; "Nice Hat," July 21, 2012; "Caching Crew and the Blustery Day," February 25, 2012; "Triskphobia," December 17, 2011; "That Ol' Dan River," August 24, 2011; and others for numerous examples). Angler's Park, Dan Daniel Park, Ballou Park, the Riverwalk, the Richmond & Danville Rail Trail (a.k.a. The Ringgold Trail), and numerous other locations offer veritable craploads of hides for the most avid geocacher. There's a couple that you have to get into a boat and paddle up the Dan to reach. Good stuff in this town, yes, sir.

Scrapple II?

This sweet little guy has been hanging around my place for a few days. He's friendly, clearly well-fed, and looks healthy, so I suspect he belongs to someone. But he seems to want to take up here, and I've got all the critters I can handle. I do hope he has a home and is just enjoying an extended visit. Maybe he's enjoying my Christmas decorations — he did try climbing up the screen door so he could see in to look at the Christmas tree.

He closely resembles a very young cat that used to come round here regularly a couple of years ago whom I called Scrapple — because he was such an energetic, scrappy little dude (who also climbed my screen door). That one hasn't been around for a long time, but the more I look at this one, the more I wonder whether it actually might be the same fellow. If it is, then someone clearly has been looking after Scrapple since he wandered off.

Mercy, I hope he belongs to someone who will take good care of him. My guys are begging that it not be me.

Xtreme-ities

Yes sir, that is a dude in a tree.

Apparently, it was just another summer weekend in December. Warm beyond the bounds of reason for this time of year — out geocaching in a T-shirt and working up a sweat with only minimal exertion. There wasn't that much minimal exertion going on, though; a fair bit of it went somewhere beyond. Yesterday, I spent a fine, full day on the caching trail in Winston-Salem before meeting up with Ms. B. and some friends for dinner and a spot of wine. Today, I teamed up with Mr. Robbin "Rtmlee" Lee for a day of hunting a few of the more challenging hides in the area, including some in dark, dank catacombs, in graveyards, up retaining walls, and one in a big old tree — which required climbing up to a man-sized hole and hoisting the ladder into the tree to grab the ammo box lurking deep inside. I gotta tell you, if it weren't for Mr. Lee, who exhibited the true meaning of dexterity, I'm pretty sure that one might have skunked us.

In keeping with the theme of extremes, I managed to consume naught but fiery, spicy food all weekend long — last night, Mexican (with loads of extra habanero sauce), and today, inferno-grade chicken wings for lunch and super-hot Thai food for dinner. That healthy glow you see on me may just be the result of about 500 roentgens.

It was a more relaxing evening, going with Ms. Brugger to pick up her Christmas tree and decorating it — accompanied by another spot of wine, just for good measure. Happy stuff.

Also very happy: received ARCs of The Monarchs from Crossroad Press. Looking like a handsome book, this. Looking forward to its official release in February....

Click the images to enlarge.

This is up under a picnic table. Which object is the geocache?

Finally, a place to cool off on a hot December day

Still chillin'.

Yay, beef! Lots!

"Beneath the Pier" to Appear in Lovecraft eZine

My short story, "Beneath the Pier," has been accepted by editor Mike Davis for Lovecraft eZine, to appear in a near-future issue. Doubter you may be, but yes it is, in fact, a Lovecraftian horror tale. I know — who'da guessed? The idea for this one happened a couple of years back on a trip to Surfside Beach, SC, with Kimberly B, Jenny Chapman, and Doug Cox. Late one night, Brugger and I went out walking and decided to hang out for a bit underneath an old pier. Turned out to be a right scary place. William Faulkner's "Delta Autumn" also provided a little inspiration, though my story is scarier. Hopefully, anyway.

Naturally, I'll shout about the publication date for "Beneath the Pier" when I know what it is. Visit Lovecraft eZine here.

The Next Big Thing: The Monarchs

If you're currently following any writers' blogs, you likely have noticed a game of tag in which a writer receives and answers a set of questions about his or her upcoming work and then tags five other writers to answer the same questions. Each of those writers tags five others, and so forth and so on, until the entire virtual world has been overwhelmed by hordes of rampant rabid writers revealing all anyone could ever hope to know in advance of their Next Big Thing. I was actually tagged several times — by David Niall Wilson, Scott Falkner, Elizabeth Massie, and John Peters — and how could I resist the doe-eyed pleading of such fine purveyors of letters to get involved in this plot to conquer all? So I said yeah, sure, why not? And thus... let us be off.

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1. What is the working title of your next book?
The Monarchs.

2. Where did the idea come from for the book?
Several years ago, following a visit with friend, writer, Crossroad Press founder, and chap who tagged me, David Niall Wilson, in Hertford, NC, I kind of got lost in the vicinity of the Great Dismal Swamp. It happened like this. Rather than leave Hertford and head home to Greensboro, I had intended to go to Martinsville, VA, to visit my mom. At the time, having no GPS, I studied Google Maps prior to leaving and wrote out some directions to get to U.S. Highway 58, just over the state line. Unfortunately, I had not zoomed in close enough on the maps to realize that not all the little back roads on my route were continuous — a couple of them had jogs in one direction or another before continuing northward. Needless to say, I missed a turn or two. This put me in some of the most desolate country I've ever encountered — mostly marshland, with only the occasional farmhouse or mobile home to suggest any human presence. I finally happened upon a little gas station and asked the attendants if they could tell me how to reach Highway 58, to which they answered, "Huh, what, where?" I purchased an honest-to-god map, finally figured out where I was, and proceeded to make only one more wrong turn before I finally reached my destination.

At the end of it all, I had just about all of The Monarchs plotted in my head. It was a maddening and frustrating experience, yet I'd certainly never take it back, for in many ways, I enjoyed visiting the desolate yet picturesque countryside, and, hey, I got a novel out of it.

3. What genre does your book fall under?
I'd have to call it horror, but the story is something of a hybrid — a southern gothic murder mystery with a touch of the Lovecraftian.

4. What actors would you choose to play the part of your characters in a movie rendition?
Heh... I love coming up with stunning casts for my various novels and stories. In my mind, the ideal cast for The Monarchs comprises both current, age-appropriate actors and some who would have been perfect for the roles in their younger days. For Courtney Edmiston, the protagonist, I'd go with Katie Parker, who starred in Absentia, a pretty nifty low-budget horror movie. For her friend, the somewhat anti-heroic Jan Blackburn, I actually used a 30-year-old Nancy Barrett, who played Carolyn Stoddard and others in Dark Shadows, as the character model. Similarly, a 25-year-old David Selby, who played Quentin Collins on Dark Shadows, would be ideal for Jan's sardonic and secretive brother, David Blackburn. For the mysterious and sinister Aunt Martha Blackburn, I'd have to go with Piper Laurie, who played Mrs. White in Carrie and Catherine Martell in Twin Peaks. The primary human antagonist, Ray Surber, has got to be Woody Harrelson; his more sympathetic but still potentially dangerous brother, Dwayne Surber, well, that's Michael Rooker, perhaps best known for his roles in Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer and, more recently, Merle Dixon in The Walking Dead.

5. What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?
Courtney Edmiston, whose life has been turned upside-down by the deaths of her husband and daughter, goes to live with her old college friend, Jan Blackburn, on the outskirts of the Great Dismal Swamp, only to find herself drawn into a deadly feud between two families as well as menaced by an ancient, unearthly horror from the depths of the swamp.

6. Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
That's not really an either/or question. Crossroad Press is essentially a traditional publisher, and will release The Monarchs as an e-book, a paperback, a hardcover, and on audio. I worked directly with them, rather than via agent.

7. How long did it take you to write a first draft of the manuscript?
The first draft took about eight months; then I let it sit for quite some time while my agent submitted proposals for it. Then, about a year later, I went back in and did a pretty fair overhaul of the entire book. That is the draft that will actually see print.

8. What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
If one must compare, I expect readers who enjoyed T.E.D. Klein's The Ceremonies would find The Monarchs satisfying. And fans of the movie Pumpkinhead would probably be all about this book.

9. Who or what inspired you to write this book?
See question 1.

10. What else about the book might pique the reader’s interest?
I think the characters and setting, in particular, really come together to create a distinct atmosphere of dread, which is the effect I was shooting for. The setting is largely fictionalized but based very closely on the real-life community of Hertford, NC, and its environs. I've been out to that part of the state many times, but that one trip that took me much deeper into the countryside than I anticipated gave me an opportunity for my creative nerves to get a thorough and very welcome workout — despite the frustration that came with getting so turned around in unfamiliar and what my mind perceived to be unwelcoming territory.

You can keep up with news about The Monarchs here on this blog and at my website: The Realm of Stephen Mark Rainey

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There you have it. Now, for my part, I shall tag these unsuspecting and likely hostile souls, who may or may not play along....

Kealan Patrick Burke
Bob Freeman
James Newman
Alexandra Sokoloff
Jeff VanderMeer

The Marks Brothers

Out for a day on the caching trail in Chapel Hill with Robbin "rtmlee" Lee. Claimed 25 total today, including a fun little thing called "The Moustache Cache" (GC338VM). You can see the problems it led to.

THE MONARCHS Scheduled for February 2013 Release

Here's The Monarchs' full cover 1–4 spread with promo text. Cover art by Austin Bentley. Crossroad Press is currently sending out review copies, which I hope will be met with much fear and loathing. Well, fear, anyway. Loathing might be a bit much. Perhaps a great gnashing of teeth instead. Yeah, that'll do nicely. The book will be released as an e-book, paperback, hardcover, and, a bit farther on, as an audio book.

I've been tagged to post a blog called "The Next Big Thing," in which I am supposed to carry on about my newest masterwork until I start frothing at the mouth and falling over backward... and then tag five other writers to do the same thing. It's fair promo, I reckon, so I'll be writing that up in the next few days. Look for it here. Or don't. But it's going to be here, never you fear.

Read.